Learn essential social expressions
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| 嗨大家好，我是李殷如。 |
| (Hài dà jiā hǎo, wǒ shì Lǐ Yīnrú.) |
| “Hi, everyone! My name is Yinru Li.” |
| In this lesson, we’ll talk about some of the most basic and essential social expressions in Chinese. |
| Social expressions are phrases and things we say in social situations. For example, thanking someone for what they’ve done for us or apologizing to someone for things we have done to them. And, actually, one of the mostly used English social expressions I personally find very useful is, “excuse me.” You know, we can use “excuse me” before we have to interrupt someone or even make, you know, apologies. Well, I’d been trying to find the exact phrase for “excuse me” in Chinese, but I have failed because there is just no one phrase in Chinese that would catch all, like excuse me would. |
| So, to say “excuse me” in Chinese, it really depends on the social context. For example, when we have to get someone’s attention, like in a restaurant, right, we would say “excuse me” in Chinese, but in this case, a very polite way to say it is simply say 你好 (nǐhǎo), like you’d say “hello.” |
| So 你好 (nǐhǎo) can be used, you know, to catch someone, to get someone’s attention, and then you tell them what you want. |
| 你好，我要这个这个... (Nǐhǎo, wǒ yào zhège zhège...) “I want this and this.” Okay. |
| So, this is the first way. |
| The second way is when we have to interrupt someone. In this case, we would say 打扰一下 (dǎrǎo yíxià). 打扰 (Dǎrǎo) means to interrupt or to disturb and 一下 (yíxià) literally means “a bit” or “a sec.” So, 一下 (yíxià) is often used after verbs in a spoken language, colloquial language to soften a command. So 打扰一下 (dǎrǎo yíxià) is like to say “Can I interrupt you for a sec?” |
| 打扰一下 (dǎrǎo yíxià) |
| Now, many times when we say “excuse me,” it’s because we have a question, we wanna ask something or someone for something. There is one phrase that’s very common in China. We use this phrase before asking a question and this phrase is 请问 (qǐngwèn). |
| 请问 (qǐngwèn) |
| 请 (qǐng) means “please” and 问 (wèn) means “ask.” So 请问 (qǐngwèn) “please ask” is actually used to say, “May I please ask?” or “Can I ask you a question?” So, you can say 请问 (qǐngwèn)... |
| 请问厕所在哪里？ (Qǐngwèn cèsuǒ zài nǎlǐ?) |
| “Excuse me, where is the bathroom?” |
| 请问这个多少钱？(Qǐngwèn zhège duōshǎo qián?) |
| “Excuse me, may I ask how much this is?” |
| So, a very useful phrase, 请问 (qǐngwèn), to ask a question. |
| Now, the last one is 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià), okay, literally means “please wait a bit.” We know 请 (qǐng) is “please” and 一下 (yíxià) is “a bit.” So 等 (děng), the verb 等 (děng) is “to wait.” So, 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià) is to have someone to wait up a sec, okay. |
| 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià) |
| Okay, these are a few different ways to say “excuse me” in Chinese. Well, actually, in most cases, I think it’s not necessary to respond to these (excuse me)s, but, well, if you feel like responding or if the other person who asked you is not really saying what they have to say, you can keep the conversation going by saying 怎么了 (zěnme le)? 怎么了 (Zěnme le) literally means “What happened?” “What’s the matter?” Well, it’s actually...it’s like saying, “Yes, how can I help you?” |
| 怎么了？ |
| (Zěnme le?) |
| It’s a pretty common phrase and it can be used in formal and informal situations, so it’s a good one to have. |
| 怎么了？(Zěnme le?) “Yes, what is it?” |
| 怎么了？(Zěnme le?) |
| Okay. So, this is how to say “excuse me” and how to respond to it if you feel like it, okay. |
| Next, let’s look at how to say “thank you” and how to respond to “thank you.” |
| Well, I’m sure many of you already know that. “Thank you” in Chinese is 谢谢 (xièxie). 谢谢 (Xièxie), yes, this is the most common way to say “thank you” in Chinese, 谢谢 (xièxie). Okay, I’m gonna teach you a little trick. So, to make your “thank you” a little bit more sincere or a little more heartfelt, you can add 你 (nǐ) after 谢谢 (xièxie), so 谢谢你 (xièxie nǐ). |
| 谢谢你 (Xièxie nǐ) is like saying, “thank you really, thank you.” And as opposed to 谢谢 (xièxie), it sometimes feel like, okay, it’s “thanks.” It’s like something you have to say. So, to avoid that, you can add 你 (nǐ) after 谢谢 (xièxie) to make a very sincere, you know, thank you, 谢谢你 (xièxie nǐ), okay. |
| Now, when someone says 谢谢 (xièxie) or 谢谢你 (xièxie nǐ) to you, you can respond by saying, first 不用谢 (bú yòng xiè), 不用谢 (bú yòng xiè), okay. 不 (bú) means “not” or “no,” 用 (yòng) means “need” in this case, and 谢 (xiè) means to thank. So 不用谢 (bú yòng xiè) is to say, “Oh, no need to thank me. You’re welcome.” 不用谢 (Bú yòng xiè), okay. |
| Thes second way to say “you’re welcome” is 不客气 (bú kèqi). Again, 不 (bú) means “not.” 客气 (Kèqi), well, 客气 (kèqi) is a little hard to translate. 客 (Kè) means “guest.” 客气 (Kèqi) is like to act or treat like a guest, which means too many formalities or too formal or too courteous, okay, like putting some distance between you and me. So, no need for any of these formalities. 不客气 (Bú kèqi), okay, you’re welcome, don’t mention it. |
| 不客气 (bú kèqi) |
| Now, next, let’s look at how to say “sorry,” how to make apologies. |
| There are three common ways to say sorry in Chinese. First one is 对不起 (duìbuqǐ), 对不起 (duìbuqǐ). 对不起 (Duìbuqǐ) literally means I can hardly face you, because, you know, because something I’ve done that’s terribly wrong, that I feel really bad about. So, 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) is a pretty serious, pretty strong apology and so I put three bars next to it. 对不起 (Duìbuqǐ) is a pretty strong apology, 对不起 (duìbuqǐ), okay. |
| Next is 不好意思 (bùhǎoyìsi). 不好意思 (Bùhǎoyìsi), in comparison, it’s a little lighter. It’s a little more casual. So, 不好 (bùhǎo) literally means to feel embarrassed, so I feel embarrassed for something I’ve done or I feel embarrassed for something I’m going to do to you, so 不好意思 (bùhǎoyìsi) is a little more casual, a little lighter apology than 对不起 (duìbuqǐ). |
| The next, 抱歉 (bàoqiàn) is also a very common way to make apologies. Well, it can be used in, like, serious apology, like as a very serious apology or a lighter one, so it’s really a personal preference. And I would say, people in Taiwan probably use 抱歉 (bàoqiàn) more than people in Mainland China, okay. |
| Now, if someone says sorry to you and you wanna assure them it’s okay, it doesn’t matter, it’s okay, and there are also a couple of different ways. First is 没事儿 (méi shì’r). 没事儿 (Méi shì’r), literally means “no issue, no big deal.” 没事儿 (Méi shì’r) “Don’t worry about it.” Okay. Also, actually, 没事儿 (méi shì’r) can be used to respond to thank you as well, okay. |
| 谢谢。 (Xièxie.) |
| 没事儿。 (Méi shì’r.) |
| It’s like: |
| “Thank you.” |
| “No problem.” |
| 没事儿。 (Méi shì’r.) |
| Okay. A pretty useful expression, 事儿 (méi shì’r). |
| And another way to say “it’s okay” is 没关系 (méi guānxi). |
| 没关系 (Méi guānxi) means “it doesn’t matter.” It’s okay, no worries, 没关系 (méi guānxi). All right. |
| Now, let’s go over these expressions one more time. |
| Ways to see “excuse me” first is 你好 (nǐhǎo). |
| 你好。 (Nǐhǎo.) |
| We can use it to get people’s attention, 你好 (nǐhǎo). |
| 打扰一下。 (Dǎrǎo yíxià.) “Can I interrupt you a little bit?” |
| 打扰一下。 (Dǎrǎo yíxià.) |
| 请问 (Qǐngwèn) “May I please ask?” To ask a question. |
| 请问 (Qǐngwèn) |
| And 请等一下。 (Qǐng děng yíxià.) Hey, please wait up for a sec. |
| 请等一下。 (Qǐng děng yíxià.) |
| And 怎么了 (zěnme le) “Yes, what is it?” How can I help you? |
| 怎么了 (zěnme le) |
| And two ways to say “thank you.” |
| 谢谢 (xièxie) |
| 谢谢 (Xièxie) and 谢谢你 (xièxie nǐ). |
| 不用谢 (Bú yòng xiè), 不客气 (bú kèqi) both mean “you’re welcome.” |
| And three ways to say “sorry.” |
| 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) |
| Yes, 对不起 (duìbuqǐ), this is a serious one. |
| And 不好意思 (bùhǎoyìsi), still sorry, but not as, you know, as strong. |
| 不好意思 (bùhǎoyìsi) |
| And 抱歉 (bàoqiàn), kind of in between. |
| 抱歉 (bàoqiàn) |
| And “It’s okay,” we can use 没事儿 (méi shì’r) or 没关系 (méi guānxi). |
| 没事儿 (méi shì’r) |
| 没关系 (méi guānxi) |
| In the next section, let’s take a look at how we can use these social expressions in real-life situations. |
| Now, in an apartment building laundry room, a young man is putting his laundry...putting his clothes in a washer, but he stopped and here is how the dialogue goes. |
| 先生，请等一下。 (Xānsheng, qǐng děng yíxià.) |
| 怎么了？ (Zěnme le?) |
| And the man who stopped the young man explains that the washer he was going to use is actually out of order, so the young man thanks the neighbour, and here is how their dialogue goes. |
| 谢谢你。 (Xièxie nǐ) |
| 不客气。 (Bú kèqi.) |
| Okay. Now, the young man found a washer that actually works, so he puts his clothes in and closed the washer door, but it makes a loud noise, so he apologizes and here is how he does it. |
| 不好意思。 (Bùhǎoyìsi.) |
| 没事儿。 (Méi shì’r.) |
| Okay, very simple dialogue. Let’s look at them one by one. |
| First: |
| 先生，请等一下。 (Xānsheng, qǐng děng yíxià.) |
| First word, 先生 (xānsheng). 先生 (Xānsheng) means “mister” or “sir” so we use 先生 (xānsheng) to address someone whose name we don’t know. Of course, it’s a male. |
| 先生 (xānsheng) |
| 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià) |
| We know 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià) means “please wait for a bit,” “wait for a sec.” |
| 请等一下 (qǐng děng yíxià) |
| And the response is: |
| 怎么了？ (Zěnme le?) “What is it?” What’s going on? What happened? |
| 怎么了？ (Zěnme le?) |
| Okay. |
| And next is saying “thank you” and how to respond to thank you. |
| They used: |
| 谢谢你 (Xièxie nǐ) and 不客气 (bú kèqi), “thank you, you’re welcome.” |
| And the third dialogue is to make an apology because he feels bad that he makes a loud noise. Okay, actually, some Chinese don’t really care for that, but I guess this is a very polite neighbour, so he apologizes by saying… |
| 不好意思。 (Bùhǎoyìsi.) |
| And the response is: |
| 没事儿。 (Méi shì’r.) “Don’t worry about it.” No issue. |
| Okay, now let’s look at a few more scenarios as a way to practice, okay? |
| Let’s say you are in a restaurant and you want to ask the waitress for a spoon, so you get the waitress’s attention by saying… |
| You can say: |
| 你好。 (Nǐhǎo.) |
| Yes, this is a good one. |
| 你好。 (Nǐhǎo.) |
| 你好。有勺子吗？ |
| (Nǐ hǎo. Yǒu sháozi ma?) |
| “Hello. Do you have a spoon?” |
| 你好。有勺子吗？ |
| (Nǐ hǎo. Yǒu sháozi ma?) |
| Okay. Next, let’s say you are meeting a client. You’re supposed to meet a client at 2:00, but it’s now 2:30. Of course, it’s really late even by Chinese standards, it’s late, 30 minutes. So you make apology by saying...对不起 (duìbuqǐ), yeah. In this case, you probably should use 对不起 (duìbuqǐ). |
| 对不起。 (Duìbuqǐ.) |
| 我迟到了。 (Wǒ chídào le.) “I’m late.” |
| 对不起, 我迟到了。 (Duìbuqǐ, wǒ chídào le.) |
| Okay. The third one, your friend brings you a gift from her trip back home, so you take the gift and you thank her by saying… 谢谢 (xièxie) or 谢谢你 (xièxie nǐ). |
| 谢谢 (xièxie) |
| Okay. |
| 谢谢！我很喜欢。 (Xièxiè! Wǒ hěn xǐhuān.) |
| I like it a lot. I like it very much. |
| 谢谢！我很喜欢。 (Xièxiè! Wǒ hěn xǐhuān.) |
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